Archives for September 2013

Parenting Teenage Girls – Aim For Parental Influence, Not Control

When you're parenting teenage girls (or, for that matter, teenage boys) your goal or aim as a parent is to exercise your parental influence, not necessarily control. Trying to control your teenager, even if she isn't particularly strong-willed, will not work and isn't healthy for her, either. The topic of parental influence vs. control is one I had to struggle with myself, as I was brought up with a parenting style that fit more in the "dominator" than the "partnership" model and I didn't want to repeat that pattern with my own kids. I grew up in the sixties and seventies and my mother was definitely controlling. I think the combination of … [Read more...]

Tired of Worrying? 5 Ways to Turn This Around

What do you worry about? If you haven't worried about anything this past week, then don't read this article. But I'm guessing you have. Even the most enlightened and spiritual will find themselves in a state of worry. We worry about different things. We worry about our daughters, marriage, job, parents or money. Your daughter worries just as much as you but over different things. (Even if she acts like she doesn't care about anything.) She worries about her friends, boyfriend or no boyfriends. She worries if she'll make the team or get in the college of her choice. Worry is an uninvited guest. You don't wake up and think … [Read more...]

How To Stop Arguing With Your Teenager

Besides telling your teenage daughter every single day that you love her (the importance of which I have written about here), refraining from arguing with her is another major step a parent can take that will do wonders for both teenage self-esteem as well as the parent-teen relationship. Not arguing includes refraining from raising your voice, cursing, and using any kind of insulting language. In fact, a recent study (that Dr. Joseph Mercola, MD has written an article on just last week) suggests that arguing, criticizing and using harsh verbal language is counterproductive and can make your child even more defiant. Not only that, it also … [Read more...]

Our Daughter’s Body Image and Ourselves

Parents, and especially Moms, I want to talk about the tough subject of your daughter’s body image, health and well being. As puberty becomes a driving force in your daughter’s life, her self-image and esteem are sure to become a part of her awareness. This time in her life is potentially the most sensitive and influential experience of her body image memories. She is adjusting to a new physical frame, emotions that go with it, the opposite sex, and the external forces of peer pressure and/or attention. It sounds like the making of a time bomb but it doesn’t have to be that way. I’ve been a guide and witness to this process for over … [Read more...]

How Do You Find Your Higher Purpose?

In last week's article I wrote about how many of society's problems (including the problem of illegal drugs being trafficked to the teenagers in our neighborhoods) will be resolved by individuals who connect with their (divine, inner) power, and fulfill their "Higher Purpose." But how do you find your higher purpose and how do you know when you're on the path of your higher purpose, as opposed to just going through your "normal" operating state? How do you know you're actually doing your higher purpose, as opposed to just going through your "default" way of being, going through the motions of your job or career? Over the course of a few … [Read more...]

My Africa Adventure – And Learning What’s Important In Life

  As an 18-year old who had just finished high school having the opportunity to travel halfway around the world to work at an orphanage in Nairobi, Kenya was all I could ever ask for. My uncle had presented me with this opportunity as he had taken the same adventure the previous year. My protective father voiced his doubts, but I was persistent, got myself a passport and other requirements, and I made this experience possible. As my trip to Africa began at the beginning of August I wasn’t nervous or scared; I didn’t really think much about it at all. Our second flight landed in Brussels and I was excited, as an 18-year old, to … [Read more...]

Catherine Austin Fitts And Winning the War On Drugs

I came across a five minute video of Catherine Austin Fitts talking about how the U.S. public is complacent about drugs being marketed to children in our own neighborhoods and the perceptions we need to change in order to finally be able to win the war on drugs. If you're not familiar with Catherine Fitts, she has served as managing director and member of the Board of Directors of a major Wall Street investment bank and as Assistant Secretary of Housing and Federal Housing Commissioner at the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development in the first Bush Administration. Ms. Fitts has been extensively interviewed on KPFA radio, an … [Read more...]

Family Traditions – 15 Fun & Meaningful Ideas For Any Family

By Matthew Toone Family traditions help provide each family member a home, an environment, and relationships of purpose in a world of confusion, disorganization, and decreasing morals and values. Traditions provide families the desired foundation of comfort, familiarity, and consistency, which helps reduce family disunity, dysfunction, and separation. And yet, the most effective family traditions are not those that only occur annually on certain holidays, they are made evident in daily and weekly habits and actions that are simple, yet significant. No, these traditions are not about large meals, big events, fancy decorations, or annual … [Read more...]

Teen Bullying – Some Thoughts, Ideas And Solutions

Many agree that teen girl bullying is at an all time high and that awareness and education about bullying needs to be increased. Increasing the awareness and the resources available at the school level is what happened when Sandra in Singapore decided that despite her daughter's pleas, it was time to reveal the identities of the three classmates who were bullying her daughter. (If you haven't already, read Sandra's teen bullying story here.) It's interesting that bullying seems to be commonplace even in Singapore, even in a country where there's a high level of homogeneity in the culture and where you can get a ticket for things like … [Read more...]

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